Drop the Rock and Re-build Your Inner Strength
By: Donna M.
Life can be trying on a good day, then add to the mix your child’s substance use disorder. When addiction/alcoholism and or mental health issues creep into a parent’s life, it’s imperative that they put on their boxing gloves because very often they will feel like a punching bag from the verbal, emotional, physical abuse that their child delivers to them. Living with a teen or adult child’s behavioral issues due to their addiction and mental health often knocks a parent off balance; it weakens them with feelings of confusion, fear, anxiety and anger. Active addiction, recovery and mental health can leave a parent feeling paralyzed, they forget what it feels like to feel normal because they are caught up in the ups and downs of addiction/alcoholism/mental illness and they adjust to living in dysfunction.
When a parent is consumed by their child, they often become addicted to saving their child and their child becomes their drug of choice. It isn’t until a parent hits their enough that they will begin to find their inner strength to pull themselves out of the drama and chaos.
Tips to re-build your Inner strength:
1. Journal: by journaling it will allow you to look back on your survival instincts. Journaling will be a reminder of the times when you survived, got through challenges, and even surprised yourself. You will see your strengths, your weaknesses, the chaos and the drama. Don’t underestimate your own resilience because you are a badass Mom, and you will take back your power when you’ve hit your enough.
2. Trust your gut instincts: Find power in your inner self, listen to your gut not your heart.
3. Drop the story: When you drop the story, it’s like dropping the big rock you’ve been carrying around on your back. Practice seeing yourself rise above your pain.
4. Build a solid foundation: The key to feeling strong is holistically creating a solid foundation with people who have walked in your shoes, attend Parents Sharing without Shame’s weekly meetings, and utilize the membership page. Surrounded yourself with positive people and atmospheres that will make you feel good.
5. Take time out to do something that is fun, something that you are good at, and something that makes you laugh. Part of pulling yourself out of a sad place is reminding your body how to release endorphins back into your system. A quick way to do this is to do something that you love to do i.e. painting, exercising, cooking etc.
6. Develop and nurture a spiritual connection to a higher power. Ask for spiritual guidance, comfort and grounding in your journey. Believe that you deserve better and stay open to receiving divine gifts. Meditate, pray, bee mindful and trust that you are going to move past your pain, your fear, your anger and anxiety because the universe wants you to be healthy and happy, joyous and free!